Sweet 3rd graders!

You remember the 3rd grader who told me not to try and say I was cool?

Today she said, "Can I borrow a picture of you for the summer?"

Totally redeemed herself ;)


P.S. - The kid from Thursday's post during testing? He took FIVE HOURS. :)

Right now.

Just in case you ever wondered what I was doing on June 4, 2009 at 11:12 a.m., here's the answer.

I'm bored.

Beyond bored.

So bored that I french braided my hair. (When was the last time I french braided my hair because I was bored? 8th grade?)

It's the 13th school day that I've spent helping with testing, and I am 2 1/2 hours in to what is on pace to be a 3 1/2 hour testing session. I just have to sit here - completely silently, without even any music - while this child finishes his test. The other 3 kids in my group finished about an hour and 45 minutes ago.

This poor child - I do feel for him. This is a lot of stress to put on a small child. But I might start nibbling on m fingers soon just for fun. I am working on progress reports for my kids, but a girl can only stare at the computer for so long. This is why I became a teacher and not some kind of office job!

3rd graders keeping it real

This morning I'm in the hallway, standing guard like I do, and this conversation happens:

Third grader: "Can I stand here with you?" (Kids always ask me this. They're just trying to get out of class)
Me: "Why? Because you think Ms. Nash is so cool?" (I said cool in a really awesome, cool way)
Third grader: Looks at me with a look of disbelief "Um, don't say that again."
Passing fourth grader: "Ms. Nash, If you're going to act like that, you really need to keep a low profile"

Guess I'm not as cool as I thought I was....

Welcome to Fair Oaks!

I just had this conversation with a 5th grader.
A FIFTH GRADER.

C: "Where you was?"
Me: "Let's try that question again."
"Oh, sorry. Where you were?"
"No, honey. Try again."
"Oh. Where was you?"
"Still not it sweetie"
"Oh. Where you went?"
"Let's try Where were you?"
"Oh, ok. Where were you?"

I love my job....

Today in 3rd grade

We were discussing the upcoming St. Patrick's Day holiday...

Me: "So what kind of creatures come out on St. Patrick's Day?"
3rd grader: "Groundhogs!"
I correct this and we move on...
Me: "What country do leprechauns come from?"
Different 3rd grader: "Cleveland!"

I guess we have some things still to work on.

Happy Valentine's Day!

A few of my kids brought me Valentine's treats today, which was sweet. This one made me smile all day:


I've never really been pro or anti Valentine's. Sad, usually, that I'm alone, but altogether rather ambivalent on the topic. While we're on the subject, I should tell you that after 30 years of no one ever wanting to date me - and me not being willing to even if they had wanted to b/c I was so embarrassed by my weight - I am completely clueless when it comes to anything to do with dating. Anything at all. It's sad. I'm basically a 31 year old middle school girl.

Not that anyone is asking me out. I'm just saying. ;)

The beautiful weather has continued, I've run my 4 miles for the day, I have a party to go to tonight (an "Anti-Valentines" party no less), and Kay is bringing the kids to Lynchburg tomorrow. I'm a pretty happy girl right now!

God is so good to me!

God just knocks me on the head sometimes with how much he loves me. Today he wanted me to know it for sure.

It was one of those days where I started out grumpy last night and hadn't managed to shake it yet. I was seriously on the very, very edge of completely losing it and curling up into a ball somewhere. (You know how you have those days? I have them fairly regularly. I'm not what you would refer to as "emotionally stable". Although in a surprising turn of events, this was the first one of these days I've had this school year. It usually happens much sooner. Like pre-school week.) Just when I was at my lowest point - I had just finished with my very hardest class, which is also my next-to-last class of the day - God intervened. 3 unusual things happened at once:

1. It was 70 degrees in February.
2. No one was out at recess (on a 70 degree day in Feb.)
3. My last class got unexpectedly pushed back half an hour at the last minute.

So I went outside and walked around the track a few times. It didn't make everything all better, but it definitely helped. And enabled me to get through my day.

God had to be right there, smiling and hugging me, pushing me through it. He is truly an awesome God.

Is this day over yet?

So it hasn't been a good day. But that happens. And at the end of it, I get to go to bed!

Honestly, my school is like a soap opera there's so much drama there. I think that's true at all schools. Is it true at other workplaces as well? I tend to think it's more true in schools because it's all women, but I could be wrong...

So yesterday I ran 4.5 miles around my complex. No problem. Kept at about a 12:00 mile, which is my estimated pace for the race. I ran on the treadmill tonight - just for 30 minutes, but I increased my speed slowly to faster than I've done before. (That's what was on the training schedule for today) No problem. (And when I say no problem, please translate that as "I didn't die") Then I got off the treadmill and started walking across the gym - I was headed upstairs to do some weights. Suddenly EXCRUCIATING pain hits my knee. Out of the blue. I didn't cry (inside the gym), but it was tough. I couldn't bend my knee and I could barely, barely walk. I slowly, slowly, slowly hobbled out through the sleet to my car. By the time I got home, the pain had lessened, but not gone away. Although my knee has been giving me some problems, this kind of pain has only happened once before. I've bought a brace and I'm wearing it now. I think I'm going to have to go see someone about this knee issue, but I have no idea who to go see about it. I think I'll ask a trainer either at the gym or at my training run on Sat.

So here's the conversation I had with a 5th grader today. It's quality. Deja has decided that my desk needs to be cleaned off (she's right), so she's done it for me. Now she's updating my pictures of Abby and Brian

Deja: "Oh, I thought these were your kids"
Me: "No, they're my sister's"
Deja: "Why don't you have any kids?"
Me: "Well, I don't have a husband."
Deja: "You don't need a husband to have a baby!"
Me: "Well, yes. I do."
Deja: " No, you don't"
Me: "Well, I do. Having a baby is a lot of work (Deja interjects: "No, it's not") and I want a partner to help me with it."
Deja: "Why don't you just get your boyfriend to help you?"
Me: "I don't have a boyfriend."
Deja: "Why not? All you have to do is go on match.com!"
Me: "Oh, I didn't realize that's how it worked."
Deja: "Yeah. Let me finish your desk, then I'll go on for you and get you a boyfriend."

Man, it's good to have Deja around.

Magic Shoe Update

So it turns out that I didn't switch my black Danskos with my mom. They're not my sister's or my brother's girlfriend's either. I don't know who else I could have switched with. Maybe they are really magic....

Our school Christmas party was tonight and I had so much fun! The staff at Fair Oaks are so fantastic. They have been so welcoming and sweet to me and I feel very much a part of them already. Plus, they're just fun, fun people. I just feel really, really, really blessed to be working there with them. (You may have to remind me of this at some point when I'm frustrated with my job. If only my job could be just hanging out with the staff.... Anyone know of a job like that?)

I don't know if you realize this or not, but I'm typing this at 12:40 am. That's two Fridays in a row I've been up past midnight. Maybe I am turning into a party animal in my old age.... probably not, though ;)

I learned an important lesson tonight - don't hate the player, hate the game. I used to get confused about which one I was supposed to hate. No more, my friends. No more. Thanks, Johnny.

Warm fuzzies

Sometimes being a teacher leads to great moments. (And often it leads to very stressful moments, but this is not about those) Last week, my 3rd graders were using a basic template to write a poem about something they like. Here's sweet Daija's poem:

Ms. Nash

I like Ms. Nash
Ask me why
Because she is beautful
Because she is funny
Because she bring books to me
Because she is nice
Because she help me on my test
Because she have nice hair
Because she have nice jewelry
Because
Because
Because
I like Ms. Nash

Not to be outdone, Tre'Shanna threw away the template and produced this one:

I like Ms. Nash

She is nice to me
and she help me on
everthing and she
help me on the test
and she her hiar is long
and her shirt is my
fivorte coler love
Tre'Shanna

We may have some work on spelling and grammer to do still :), but I may frame them anyway. I just love these kids! Last week's dance party was another example of how awesome they are :)

Today I went to Charlottesville to shop with my cool friends Sarah and Meg who used to teach with me. We went to the Barracks Road shopping center and David Baldacci was there speaking and signing books at the Barnes and Noble! I love his books and was so excited. Sarah and Meg patiently waited over an hour while I listened to him talk and waited in line to get him to sign a book to my grandmother (I was #65 in line!)

I have decided that in order to solidify my status as a young adult woman, I need to join a book club. Because that's what we do. So I am now officially looking for a book club to join. I don't know how to begin. Any ideas?

Surviving :)

God was so good to me yesterday.

Someone must have been praying for me, because I admit- I didn't take the time to do it for myself. It was a long day at school - we had a parent workshop last evening and I'm on the committee in charge of it. But Title 1 pays for a lot of the stuff, and I had some Title 1 requirements to meet as well, so I had a big part in pulling it off. I was at school for 12 1/2 hours yesterday which were completely and totally filled with business. I didn't stop to rest at all. (Well, I did get to sit down and eat my lunch. That was nice.) I had a to-do list that blew my mind. The workshop was taking place in 6 different classrooms so I had to be sure we had everything and distribute it between the classrooms. Usually having this much on my plate causes me to hyperventilate and cry ;)

Yesterday it didn't.

I calmly went from one task to the next, checking them off and moving to the next. I (amazingly) didn't get tired or run down. It just got done and the whole thing got pulled off. I won't say without a hitch b/c there were hitches - but everything worked out. The evening was well attended and, even better, it's over!

Today is Friday, the last day of this crazy week. I have a Title 1 meeting all day today. While this may sound like a relief, these meetings inevitably stress me out more than I was before because of all the paperwork and procedures. Plus, Fridays I don't teach as many groups at school so I can get caught up on my paperwork - which I have a lot of at the moment. So this meeting is really the last thing I want to be doing. But I have learned that, as someone says, "If God brings you to it, he will get you through it." Now I know that saying should be applied in more dire situations than mine, but I'm using it anyway.

And tonight - I get to hang out with some good friends! And tomorrow - possibly more good friends! And that will just make it all better. Then next week - Thanksgiving!!!!!

So, thank you for your kind words and supports. And especially your prayers, you mystery prayers out there!

A tired, grumpy Gus

That's me. It was such a long day today. I ate all 3 of my meals at meetings - now tell me that doesn't just scream FUN to you!!

Tomorrow is a parent workshop that I've been working on and it's causing me major stress. I'll be happy when it's over with. Then Friday I have a Title 1 meeting all day long which always makes me feel more stressed - so I'm just holding on until Friday afternoon.

Today I got an email which made me so mad that I cried. I have been trying to get the answer to a procedural question - which really should be a fairly routine thing - for over 2 months now. I emailed the girl for the 4th time on Monday and today I got her reply. Not only did the answer not make any sense and only added to the confusion, she added "In the future, you should ask this question earlier." I just keep reminding myself - I have been forgiven for so much, I can forgive others. I make a lot of mistakes, too. By the grace of God, I did not slap anyone today. I will continue to pray about tomorrow...

Which brings me to this point - when I get mad, I always cry. Does anyone else do that? Then I get madder because crying is NOT the reaction that I want to be having. I'm MAD and I want people to know it!!! So then I just cry more. It's pitiful.

To add to my frustration, Tyler Zeller - a very talented freshman who we were really counting on, especially with Hansbrough out - is out for the season with a broken wrist and I won't get to see the next game on Friday night. And I'm not losing weight anymore, apparently. I guess my body got tired of that game. Plus my cats will not stop walking on me no matter how hard I throw them. I'm getting dangerously close to taking one of my dad's suggestions on how to deal with these creatures.

Not to mention that I can no longer eat my frustrations away. Which I suppose I should be thankful for. And may be someday. But for now I just want to spend money instead. I almost bought a Wii tonight. Just because. But honest to goodness when would I play it? Plus, apparently all of my money is going towards buying pizza for the workshop tomorrow night. Ok, we are NOT going back to that issue. No. We are not.

I could go on because my life's frustrations are multitudonous. (I am a Master of Reading. If I say it's a word, it's a word) But I suppose I'll stop. Because that way I can go to bed.

What 100 pounds looks like - Sarah style

I've been in one of those vicious cycles where I keep thinking of things to write about, then I don't, so I feel like there is more that I have to write about so the task becomes overwhelming so I don't do it, and then there is more stuff to write about so it's more overwhelming... know what I mean?

Anyway, I've realized that it's just a blog. About nothing but me. So I can relax a bit. Speaking of the "about nothing but me" part - I feel like I owe you (the great collective "you" that is out there reading this) an apology/explanation: This blog is completely, totally self-centered. That feels very self-absorbed of me. But I really only started it as away for me to have like a journal of my experiences after WLS. Of course, now I write about other things in my life as well. And I'm glad that so many of my friends read it :) But that's why it's only ever about me. Sorry about that.

I can't believe I'm doing this on this very public internet, but here it is. My "before" picture (I could have at least fixed myself up a little don't you think?) and my "I've lost 100 pounds" picture. I've been taking pictures all along (definitely something I would encourage you to do, by the way, if you are considering or have had the surgery) (or are losing weight another way), but always considered them very private. But for some reason I'm feeling brave enough to show them to you tonight. So here they are:


Can you tell which is the before and which is the after? ;) (I'm kidding, of course. Even I can see the difference there). I've been doing these with the self-timer on my camera and they haven't been coming out great. My friend Laura took the most recent one last night, though, and I think I'm going to get her to do them all from now on because I'm pretty sure I look skinnier in that picture than I do in real life :)

The greatest time of the year is upon us, people. That's right - CAROLINA BASKETBALL SEASON HAS STARTED!!!!!!!! My Heels opened up their season with a 15-point win over Penn yesterday which I, much to my everlasting consternation, did not get to see. I realize that a 15-point win over Penn is not very impressive. Especially for a team that is ranked unanimously #1 by everyone who does these things and is bombarded by talk of the "undefeated season". (I hate that talk, by the way. Absolutely, positively, hate it. I'm going on record right now as saying that I won't be completely devastated if we lose an early season game - before conference play starts of course - just to shut that up. ) But our injury list reads like a top-1o team all on its own. Hopefully we should get most of our major players back soon. Next up - Kentucky on Tuesday night in a game I actually get to see!!!! Kentucky is obviously a pretty major game. Don't let the fact that they lost to VMI at home fool you. Even though that's horrifyingly embarrassing, this is Kentucky. Luckily they will have my excellent from-home coaching to help guide them through.

I had a fun weekend celebrating my BFF's 30th. Happy Birthday Julie!!!!!

Her dad told me this weekend that I seemed different. I pointed out that I had lost 100 pounds :) He said no, my personality seemed different. He thought that I had become more confident and extroverted without so much extra weight. I don't know if he's right, but I've been thinking about it. I did just post a pretty embarrassing picture here...

What I really, really wanted to post was the video I made of my super-awesome kids at our dance party on Friday. Those kids are hysterical. But I've tried all weekend and can't get the video to upload. I did get it uploaded to my Facebook page, though, so click here to see it.

Ok, I have been lazying away my Sunday afternoon (which is what they are good for) but since I don't have any lesson plans done for this week I guess I better get on that!

Don't say I never gave you anything...

That's me inside the Clifford suit. Totally exciting, huh?

Clifford!

In the WLS community, people often refer to "wow moments" - when you realize how your weight loss has affected your life. I tend to think it's cheesy, naturally b/c I'm cynical like that, but I had one yesterday.

For our Book Fair/Community Day pep rally, our librarian asked me to wear the Clifford costume. For most of you out there who have always fit into the one-size-fits-all-category, this probably doesn't even seem like a big deal. But I've always had this secret fear of someone not realizing that I was fat (um, how does that happen exactly?), asking me to do it, and me not being able to fit in it. Because I wouldn't. So when she asked me I was shocked that she considered me normal-enough sized to be able to do it. That was exciting moment #1. #2 came when it actually fit. And #3 came when the kids couldn't guess who I was - I guess all the fat didn't show through as much as I thought it would. I had a great time being Clifford, by the way :)

The joys of teaching elementary school...

Today I went to school looking like this:


Yeah. It was Wacky Hair Wednesday! I love Spirit Week. I totally forgot Mismatch Monday, even though I had an awesome outfit. But yesterday was team Tuesday and I did it right - unfortunately, I don't have any UNC pants so I wore some white cropped pants (thanks, K-K!) with UNC socks and shiny Carolina blue clogs, which is a nice look. I also had on a UNC t-shirt, jacket, earrings, hair ribbon, and hair clips. Oh, and my lanyard that I carry my ID and key on is UNC. And I carried a UNC mug. It rocked. Tomorrow is Thinking Cap Thursday (hat day - not so exciting, but I'll bust out a UNC hat), and then is Flannel Friday - pajama day.

This afternoon as I'm walking down the hall I see one of my third graders swinging her arms wildly back and forth above her head. I asked her why she was swinging her arms and she answered:

"I don't got no underwear"

Hmmmm. I decided it was best to leave that one alone.

This afternoon I went for a "run", not realizing that it is HOT AS ANYTHING out there. I mean, really hot. I got so hot I got chills. I literally had goosebumps all up and down my arms. But I did 4 miles. Which is 5 laps around my trail. The first 4 laps I did more "running" than walking - a good bit more, actually - but the last lap I just walked. I considered it my cool down lap. It took me about 50-55 minutes. Something miraculous has happened since I've started working out more - the trail has gotten shorter. I'm pretty sure it has. It used to be all I could do to do 2 laps - and it took me my full 40 minute workout. So the trail must be getting shorter!

Ok, I'm taking a survey here. This is something that I've been thinking about a lot lately. I know, it's whacked out and strange but these are the things that go through my head. And this is my blog, where I write things that go through my head. I'm down about 90 pounds right now (since March when I started boot camp), which means naturally I'm thinking about hitting that 100-pound loss mark. My goal is to hit it before my family reunion Nov. 7. Of course, I've been stuck at the same weight for almost a week now, so I may never get there and this may be a moo point. (you know - a moo point. It's like a cow's opinion. It doesn't matter.) (Thanks, Joey!) Back to my question - when I hit 100 pounds lost, do I post that information in my Facebook status? Because it's exciting. But do I want to admit that I had 100 pounds to lose - and I'm still fat? Of course, people knew because - well, they could see me. Still. I know, this is one of those major dilemmas that world leaders lose sleep over.

I best go get in the shower b/c I smell BAD and I am going to teach Kid's Club at church tonight. Call me sometime!

Drowning

No, that title has no deep meanings. Clearly you don't know me very well. It in fact references the fact that it's been raining all day today and is supposed to continue for about 2 more days. If I could just curl up inside and do nothing, I wouldn't mind so much. But this whole "work, responsibility, and being an adult" thing is getting in the way. But I do love listening to it. Here are some gratuitous rain pics for you:





Just a little FYI, my dad and I have co-founded a club. The "Our Life is Sadder and Harder Than Anyone Else's" club, based on the premise that Mom has been hanging out with the two cutest, sweetest babies in the world all week and we haven't.

Not much to report - all of my beginning of the year paperwork is due next week and I'm going a little crazy between trying to figure it all out and the drama that goes along with working with women. (Those of you who work with men or in mixed environments weigh in here - is there a lot of gossiping and "discussing" of others? Or is that because of the estrogen overload?) I swear, this month is dddrrrraaaaggggggiiiiiiiinnnnnnnnngggggggg by.

So it's not so much a kid quote, but I'm not used to kids who are old enough to have a sense of humor and I thought this was funny. I was helping in a 5th grade class the other day and I walked over to help a kid and he told me he was allergic to teachers. A minute later I walked by his desk and he gave this big fake sneeze. I couldn't help it - I laughed. These kids crack me up.

So this weekend is going to be very laid-back, but then I have about a whole month of busy weekends coming up. I'm looking forward to all of the fun stuff I'll be doing, but I'm definitely going to enjoy the opportunity to relax while I can now!

I've been trying to bore myself to sleep and I think it's working now. Nighty night!

Great.

A kid at school asked me if I was pregnant today. Awesome.

Tired and Whiny

One of my mom's favorite sayings is "If you can't say something nice, don't say anything at all". In that vein, maybe I shouldn't even be posting tonight. But I am - because the point of this blog is to be like a diary for me to document my journey.

I'm having a really hard time getting my head around this whole new-way-of-eating thing. Which is frustrating to me b/c I spent a lot of time getting ready for it and knew what I was getting into. Fully. But I get so irritated that I have to think so much about what I have to eat, and I never feel like eating when I should, or then I get really hungry but I don't feel like fixing anything so I just mope around and get grumpier. Then I get frustrated and start chastising myself, which makes me defensive (with myself, naturally, because this is a normal thing) and even more irritable and want to do/eat something I'm not supposed to just to prove that "I can". To myself. (picture Napoleon Dynamite saying "idiot!" here)

To add to that, we had our first Title 1 staff meeting today. The nice thing was that it wasn't until 9, so I got to sleep in. But it was very overwhelming and stressful for me. I feel like every time I start to figure out something I should be doing with this job, I find out I'm doing it wrong and have to start over. I love the job, but I'll like it much better if I ever get it all figured out.

To top it off, I'm just not feeling good. Not sick - nothing that I should actually complain about. Just tired, with frequent feelings of nausea and light-headedness. Plus the whole grumpier-than-Oscar-the-Grouch thing. Maybe I'm PMSing. That would actually be great, because then I would have a reason and know it will be over soon.

To be fair, I had a lot of these same feelings about eating before surgery. But then I would just order a pizza or go to McDonalds to resolve it, and those are not viable options now. Which is good, because that's why I ended up in this position in the first place. But I need to find another way to resolve it. And it has to be one that makes me happy when I'm this irritable, and that's no easy task. As anyone who knows me well knows, once I get into a grumpy-funk pretty much everything just makes it worse. A lot of times, honestly, I just have to take a nap and sleep it off.

Ok, I'm signing off now. Heading to bed so that I can get up tomorrow and try and handle another situation I have no earthly idea how to do - Title 1 parent orientation. Pray for me. Lots. Please.

Little updates :)

It just occurred to me the other day - when I read other WLS patient's blogs, I always want to know how much weight they're losing. Yet I never post mine. I don't know why. Maybe b/c I already know so I'm not curious :) Anyway, it's not a secret so I thought I'd share. To date, since I started pre-op "boot camp" back in March, I've lost about 75 pounds. It hasn't come off evenly, though. The stats:

• Pre-op (3 1/2 months): 27 pounds
• 1st 2 weeks after surgery: 20 pounds
  
• Next 6 weeks: 17 pounds (yes, this was a very frustrating 6 weeks)
• Last 2 weeks: 11 pounds

I think that comes out close to 75. I'm thinking the goal is to average around 5 lb/week. Everyone has different ideas, though.

This was an exciting WLS-related story: I have these pants that I love. They're from Lands End, just elastic-waist, loose, cotton pants. When I'm at home I practically live in them, and I wear them to sleep in a lot (I have two pairs). I've noticed just in the last week or so that they're really getting too big to wear. This morning they literally fell off of me as I was walking from the bathroom to my bedroom. Just fell off. As excited as I am about the lost weight, I'll be a little sad to lose my favorite pants...

I'm such a nerd. Tonight I'm reading Practice with Purpose by Debbie Diller and I'm just so interested and enthralled by it. I love it! I read Literacy Work Stations when I was a K teacher, but it's so much fun to learn about what these bigger kids can do. I can't wait until I get to stop giving QRIs and get to start actually teaching! (Do not get me started on the nonsense that is preventing me from doing that now. I might just scream.) Don't get me wrong - I actually enjoy assessing kids, especially being able to do it like I am not - without having to be teaching the class at the same time. But let me give you this example - one student read me a 591 word passage yesterday. It took him 11 minutes. ELEVEN. MINUTES. To give you a frame of reference here, this entry alone is 583 words. And I have to do this for all 50-some odd 5th graders. Plus the word lists and comprehension questions. So while I don't mind doing it, it's very time consuming. Plus, I've heard the same 4 passages over and over and over again. Anyone want to know about Johnny Appleseed? Lois Lowry? Margaret Mead? I can fill ya in.

Brian came home from the hospital today. When I talked to Mom, she was sitting on the bed, burping Brian reading to Abby who was sitting beside her. Does that sound awesome or what? I was jealous. When I talked to Bruce and asked him how Brian liked his house so far he said, "He thinks it's a great place to sleep in" Apparently Brian isn't doing the awake-time thing so much yet. That's ok, though. And he didn't cry at all when they put him in his car seat. So hopefully this trend will continue and he will be laid-back. My sister deserves one laid-back child :)

Ok, back to the book now! UNC football is on ESPN tonight. That doesn't happen often, so check it out. Go Heels!!!