"Life ain't always beautiful...

...but it's a beautiful ride." So says Gary Allen. And I happen to agree with him. Today, anyway :)

It's been a long time, but I went running today. (I did about 3.5 miles - an average run - and it nearly killed me. Here's some advice - if you exercise regularly, and you should ;), don't stop for a couple of weeks. It's amazing how quickly you lose everything you've gained) While I ran, I listened to my iPod - of course - and did some deep thinking about my life. Here are some of my thoughts:

- They say that God never gives us more than he can handle. Clearly God knows that battling depression and being fat and single are all that I can handle. (He's right, by the way - those things have broken me more than once) Because he has given me so many good things - an amazing family, a career that I enjoy, and more good friends than any one person deserves. Building 429 has a song where they say "I believe always, always our Savior never fails" that I was listening to while I ran. And I believe that, too. Here's the thing about me - I make a lot of bad choices. And I tell God about them. But so often I don't want to ask him to help me stop. I'm perfectly happy making bad choices. So I just tell him - "Hey, God. Here's what I'm doing. And I'm happy about it. So deal with it." It's probably not the best thing to do, but I figure at least I'm talking to him. Not keeping him out of my life. And I figure he is big enough to deal with it.

- I asked my doctor to put me back on Lexapro, an antidepressant. He gave me 4 weeks worth of samples, and I just started the 4th week. I think it's really helping. I think I need to go to counseling as well, and I'm working on getting there.

- Yesterday was the one year anniversary of my surgery. Hard to believe. I can't even begin to list the ways that my life is different than it was last year (although I probably will soon), or to adequately express my appreciation for the support from everyone in my life. I have never had one person say something negative or unsupportive to me. Not one. That is a truly amazing gift. I celebrated by doing something I couldn't have done a year ago - going to King's Dominion and riding roller coasters. I also went to support group, went over to the Masinick's for dinner and cards with the Palmers, then went to karaoke with the WEPC crew, followed by a late-night meal at Waffle House. Altogether a completely amazing day.

- As I told them at support group last night, it's been an up and down year for me with 9 months of hard work and 3 months of complete failure. I'm still working on not grazing and getting my eating back under control. Slowly, slowly, one day at a time....

My family took an awesome trip to Orlando last week to visit my brother and got to go to Sea World and Aquatica (Sea World's water park) while we were there. I love them! Here are some pictures:

The whole family!

We helped William move. Abby cleaned and Brian moved boxes...


Sea World!

Shamu

Abby LOVED the dolphins


Bruce thought it would be funny if I pretended to be too short to ride the roller coaster

The two cutest kids at Sea World eating lunch

Sisters posing with Shamu :)

Abby had fun at Aquatica, too!


Back at the hotel, Abby wanted to go swimming every day



The luckiest and happiest aunt and uncle in the world!

The Nash siblings!

I did it! :)

So I did it. I finished the Monument Ave. 10k! I finished it and I ran the whole time, which were my two big goals. My secret goal was to finish in under 70 minutes - I finished in 70 min exactly. So 1 second faster.....But that's ok. I finished 14,527 out of 26,242 finishers. I was surprised at how hard it was, but I'm glad I did it. I'm actually doing another one this Saturday - the bridge run in Charleston. I'll be down there for Spring Break anyway and my brother-in-law was doing it, so I said I'd do it with him. I figure if I run 10ks 2 weekends in a row I can then justify taking my spring break week off from running :) I'm not sure what I'll do after that...still thinking about it.

The Monument Ave. 10k also has a costume contest and my friends won it! I was so excited for them! Their Ms. Pac-Man costume was awesome.

2.5 days to go until Spring Break....I can't wait....

P.S. Yes, I realize it has been almost a month since I posted. I apologize. I'll just say that this whole WLS journey has been like a roller coaster - up, down, up, down. This has been a down time. I will post about it at some point - you know how I believe in putting it all out there for others to see :) - but I'm just not quite ready to do that yet. So I've been avoiding it.

Ready for a break

Hello. Am alive.

(I just read a book narrated by 4 characters with 4 different voices. One spoke like that - with no subjects in her sentences. It was weird. Also, eventually the 4 characters interacted and when she was narrating, they all spoke like that. But when someone else was narrating, they spoke normally. Not sure what this literary technique is called. Also not sure I like it.)

February has been a crazy busy month for me. The last week has arrived with blessedly little to do on the calendar, and I'm really looking forward to a low key week/weekend. I like being busy and have enjoyed most of the business of the past month or so. And I won't be upset if things come up this week. But still. Some down time is always nice.

I keep thinking that I need to be posting - I really want to have a record of my whole WLS journey. I just don't think that I really have anything to say. Things are just moving along.... I'm down about 130 pounds currently. I did buy a pair of size 12 jeans at Wal Mart the other day. They are probably the only pair of size 12s in the world that fit me, but still...there's one. I'm torn between being excited about this and desperate to hit a single digit size. Crazy, I know. I don't know which is more amazing - the fact that I ran 5 miles today or the fact that I no longer find that blogworthy.

Bad eating habits are starting to creep back in - grazing, "needing" something sweet because I'm so grumpy, etc. Not as bad as they were before, but they are things that I need to address NOW. It's hard for me because even with that, the weight is still coming off. It's hard to remember that won't always be the case. So that's my current struggle.

I promise I'll work on thinking of something interesting to say before I post again....

Happy Valentine's Day!

A few of my kids brought me Valentine's treats today, which was sweet. This one made me smile all day:


I've never really been pro or anti Valentine's. Sad, usually, that I'm alone, but altogether rather ambivalent on the topic. While we're on the subject, I should tell you that after 30 years of no one ever wanting to date me - and me not being willing to even if they had wanted to b/c I was so embarrassed by my weight - I am completely clueless when it comes to anything to do with dating. Anything at all. It's sad. I'm basically a 31 year old middle school girl.

Not that anyone is asking me out. I'm just saying. ;)

The beautiful weather has continued, I've run my 4 miles for the day, I have a party to go to tonight (an "Anti-Valentines" party no less), and Kay is bringing the kids to Lynchburg tomorrow. I'm a pretty happy girl right now!

God is so good to me!

God just knocks me on the head sometimes with how much he loves me. Today he wanted me to know it for sure.

It was one of those days where I started out grumpy last night and hadn't managed to shake it yet. I was seriously on the very, very edge of completely losing it and curling up into a ball somewhere. (You know how you have those days? I have them fairly regularly. I'm not what you would refer to as "emotionally stable". Although in a surprising turn of events, this was the first one of these days I've had this school year. It usually happens much sooner. Like pre-school week.) Just when I was at my lowest point - I had just finished with my very hardest class, which is also my next-to-last class of the day - God intervened. 3 unusual things happened at once:

1. It was 70 degrees in February.
2. No one was out at recess (on a 70 degree day in Feb.)
3. My last class got unexpectedly pushed back half an hour at the last minute.

So I went outside and walked around the track a few times. It didn't make everything all better, but it definitely helped. And enabled me to get through my day.

God had to be right there, smiling and hugging me, pushing me through it. He is truly an awesome God.

25 random things about me

Ok, I am totally and completely addicted to Facebook. Love the stalker aspect of it, love seeing pictures, love everything about it. (Except the 15,000 random requests I get every day. I don't even look at those) So this trend started where everyone had to write 25 random things about themselves. There have been other trends, but this is the only one that got the Sarah Nash "Cool Seal of Approval" (an award more highly coveted than the Good Housekeeping Seal) I had so much fun reading other peoples notes! So I thought I would share my post:

Um, I forgot to cut and paste the rules here. Seriously, is there anyone out there who doesn't know the rules by now? I was going to say I'm pulling a Katie Masinick and not tagging anybody. Then Katie caved and tagged people. So I'm just going to say that I'm not tagging people because everyone's already been tagged and I like to be defiant like that. I DO want to read your list, though......so write one already!

1. My two favorite things are UNC basketball and my niece and nephew, Abby and Brian. (ok this one’s not random. Everyone already knows this)

2. I almost always have half a glass of Cherry Coke Zero chillin’ in my refrigerator, getting flat so I can drink it later.

3. I have Jawad Williams’ leftover chicken wings in my freezer.

4. I’m somewhat of a control freak. That’s why I like teaching. Also why my favorite basketball position is point guard.

5. I get unreasonably angry over things which I have absolutely no control, such as college basketball and the weather.

6. At the beginning of the season, I write every UNC basketball game on my calendar including opponent, location, time, and tv channel.

7. I am a co-founder and co-president of Not Sarah’s Game Club, going strong for 5 years now!

8. I talk to my mom and my sister almost every day. I see my family at least once a month, and I cry every time I leave them.

9. My friends call me “Speed” because in high school I got two speeding tickets in the same spot doing the same speed within a few months of each other. Some call me “Sidim” and we will not discuss the reasons why.

10. I wish I could take a nap and a hot bath every single afternoon.

11. I have been on two cruises – one to the Caribbean and one to Alaska. I researched them to death, did everything I wanted to do, and loved every minute. Do I want to do another one? Ah. Take it or leave it.

12. I hate, loathe, and despise email forwards. Especially when the sender, who is supposed to a fully grown woman (JULIE SMITH IN COLLEGE) adds things like “I know this is silly, but I don’t want bad luck....”

13. I have a sleeping routine. I have to lay (or is it lie?) (It’s lie – Clark says “Chickens lay, people lie”) on my back, my side, my stomach, my other side, and back to my stomach. Then I have to sleep with one arm straight up under the pillow and the other hand under my cheek. One leg has to be bent up while the other is straight. Some people find this tossing and turning when I first go to bed to be disruptive. I find it to be normal and calming.

14. I have a blog instead of a journal because it looks prettier.

15. I’m running my first 10k at the end of March. That’s 6.2 miles. 10 months and 125 pounds ago, I couldn’t even run 6.2 feet.

16. My sister is my best friend and my hero. I want to be just like her when I grow up. She’s smart, funny, pretty, organized, and basically does it all with a smile like it’s no big deal. I need her to help me remember family member’s names and I don’t like to buy clothes unless she approves them first.

17. At one point I wanted to move to Maine, but then I realized I was too much of a Momma’s girl to move that far away from home. For the same reason, I think I’m the only person not to put “I love to travel” on my 25 things list. In fact, I think I’ll go ahead and put “I don’t like to travel” just to be shocking.

18. I’m the pickiest eater you’ll ever meet. I don’t eat any fruit or seafood. I like a few vegetables – broccoli, cauliflower, green beans, potatoes – but mostly with cheese on them. When people find out I don’t like fruit, they start listing them. “Really? Not even apples? Or grapes?” or they try and trick me “What about tomatoes?” Yes, people. I KNOW what fruits are. I just don’t like them.

19. I think that people seriously underestimate the importance of kids repeatedly reading and re-reading on their independent level.

20. I refuse to use abbreviations in text messages.

21. I still have 3 living grandparents. My grandaddy died 3 years ago and I miss him every day.

22. The only thing I really want out of a life is to be a wife and mother. I think I’ll always feel like a failure without that, but I’m working on it (the feeling like a failure, not the becoming a wife and mother).

23. I love The Office, but I think Psych is the funniest show on television. My dream guy has a lot of Jim Halpert and Shawn Spencer in him. I also loved that old show Sports Night that got canceled way too soon.

24. I spend a lot of time thinking about the first person I want to see or the first question I want to ask when I get to heaven. I think it may be “What kind of a student was Jesus? How old was he when he learned to read?”

25. I don’t believe in NASA. I believe it exists, I just don’t believe it should. Why spend billions of dollars on something that may possibly be out in space when we have tons of people here without food, homes, doctors, or books??

26. In high school, I had a “pillar of coldness” that kept me cold all the time. As I got super fat, it melted and I had little problem staying warm. Now that I’ve lost some weight I’ve rediscovered cold in ways I never knew existed. How is it possible to be THIS cold all the time??!!??!!

My list has 26 things on it because I love breaking rules!

A Beautiful Day!

So today we finally had some nice warm, sunny weather - the first time in a long, long time! It was so exciting! So I went to church, then went out to lunch with some friends from church. They were playing ultimate frisbee this afternoon so I went home, threw on an old t-shirt from the play I did in high school (Go Go Go Joseph!), and headed out to join them. I didn't actually play frisbee - I am no good at that and people who take these things seriously would get irritated if I tried to play - but I did play a little bit of basketball, which is awesome. I need to do that more. Then I headed over to the Masinick's to catch the end of their barbeque and play some ladderball. (Awesome game)

While this may sound like an awesome, fun day to anyone, to me it was nothing short of a miracle. Let me tell you all of the things from this day that would have never happened last year - note the phrase "some friends from church". I made friends, which is not something I did well when I was super fat. Note that I went to be involved in some outdoor physical activitiy - not something I could have done fat. Note that I threw on an old t-shirt from high school. It's actually looser now than it was then. Why I kept it all these years, I don't know. My life now is made up of miracles everyday and I'm so, so grateful.

I'm rarely sappy, but today I was just feeling this so much. I even called my mom and told her thank you. Not only did she pay for my surgery, but she encouraged me every step of the way. I have a long, uphill battle still to go but I'm celebrating how far I've come for now.

A dream come true!

I've talked before about how much I love really old movie outfits. Well, this weekend I went to a movie character themed birthday party, and I rented a dress and went as Guinevere. (You know? From Camelot? She was a bit of a tramp but the greatest, most idyllic kingdom ever was destroyed because of her?) It was sooooo exciting for me. I love being Guinevere. I want to be her every day. Here are some pics:

The outfit

The hairdo

Not only did I love being Guinevere, but it's amazing to me to be able to wear a costume at all. When I was fat, I could never have found an awesome outfit like this. In fact, I probably wouldn't have been willing to even go to this party. It's so strange how so, so much about my life is different now.

In running news, I've decided to scale back my training a bit. I was using the Y training schedule, but I was combining the novice and intermediate training schedules a bit. So I'm going to stick from now on just to the novice schedule. Although I can do the longer runs from the intermediate schedule, I think I'm running more often now then I was before which is making it more difficult. So I'm going to try and be ok with taking it slowly and setting more realistic expectations for myself, which can be frustrating to me.

One more note - I'm working on setting up a second blog where I'm copying all of my posts about WLS. That way if you don't know me and don't care about all of the other nonsense in my life, but are interested in hearing about my WLS journey I can send you there. I'm telling you this now so that I get motivated to finish it and get it up and running :)

Being 31 - ahhhh!

I am not and will not do a sappy reflection on how different my 31st birthday was from my 30th. Because that's just not how I roll. But I will say this - I know I'm different than I was last year, and I got more love and attention for my birthday yesterday than I would have thought possible. I'm clearly in a different place with the people around me, especially at work. To be completely honest with you, it was a bit overwhelming. I'm not terribly shy but I think I'm glad birthdays only come once a year :)

I also decided that since it was my birthday I could eat whatever I wanted all day long. And I did. MISTAKE, Sarah. I'm not going to go into what I ate - because I'm embarassed, and because that's not what I do, and a lot because I don't want to be reprimanded - but I ate basically throughout the day. I didn't get sick or dump or anything, but I did feel generally yucky. And it didn't really help me enjoy my birthday. NOTE TO SELF: Find other ways to celebrate your birthday. :)

So this morning was my first run in the YMCA 10k training program. (They ran last week, but I was in Charleston. Luckily for me, too, because apparently it was 7 degrees last week. SEVEN. This week it was 52. Much more acceptable) We did 2.5 miles today and I did fine, although my knee was bothering me some at the end. I stayed somewhere in the middle of the huge group (there were like 200 people there!). I definitely got passed a lot, but I passed some people, too - mostly walkers. :) They put us into groups based on our projected finish time. I signed up for a wave that finishes in about 70-75 minutes - about a 12:00 mile. That was the fastest group at the training this morning, which is scary. (I'm signed up for the novice runner group - there are some run/walkers - there's also a walkers group and an intermediate group) I hope I'm not in over my head here. I definitely felt like the fat girl that everyone was looking at going, "Seriously? What is she thinking?" It may not be true, but that doesn't stop me from feeling that way!

I also picked up my schedule for the next 9 weeks and surprisingly enough, the most it ever has us running in training is 6 miles, which it only has us do once two weeks before the race. Then it backs the mileage down until the day of the race, which is 6.2 miles. Does this strike anyone else as odd?

Today my friend Laura is coming and we're going to visit Julie and her new baby. Yay! I have been out-of-control busy the last week and a half and have completely neglected my poor BFF, the new mom. Hopefully she'll forgive me and I'll be able to make it up to her.

I'm off to clean up a bit and NAP. That's my most exciting plan for the day. I hope you get one, too!

No gallstones for me!

MY BFF JULIE HAD HER BABY ON FRIDAY!!!!!!

Lila was born at 7:23 am and weighed in.....um, I forgot. But she weighed in as something. 7 lb, ? oz maybe? Anyway, she's really, really cute. Julie was in the hospital 3 days and I went to see her 4 times :) They came home Monday so tomorrow night I'm taking them dinner and I can't wait to see that sweet baby at home away from all that hospital stuff! She's absolutely perfect and I LOVE that I live so close to her. Poor Julie is going to want to kick me out soon! I'm not going to post any pictures b/c I haven't asked Julie if it's ok. But I will if she says ok.

So, after a few days of phone tag with the surgeon's office, I found out today that my ultrasound was clear and I don't have gallstones. I didn't really think I did, but I feel better having ruled it out. There are, however, two downsides to this situation - 1. This pain isn't terribly frequent but I don't handle pain well and it HURTS. Now I don't know how to fix it. and 2. I had to get the ultrasound done at the hospital where I was considered an outpatient and my co-pay was $100!!! But, all in all, good news.

I know I haven't updated lately - smack my hand here - so here's what's going on with me:

- I have been a GRUMP RUMP this week. I felt icky on Monday, but I don't really know what's going on here. I have not been really pleasant to be around, so be glad you're not around me. I apologize if you are.

- I don't know if I've talked about this much, but I've had to seriously scale back my running because my knee has really been hurting (see previous point about me not handling pain well). I was up to running 3-4 miles at a time, but for the last month or two I've only been about to make it about 2 before it hurts so badly I can't run anymore. So mostly I've been doing other things - swimming, classes at the gym, the elliptical, etc. Several people have told me to go get good running shoes, so yesterday I took some of my Christmas money to Roadrunner and had them watch me run and evaluate me and help me pick out good shoes. The girl was really nice and I picked out some Nikes. So last night I went to the gym and ran on the treadmill. My knee didn't hurt nearly as bad when I ran, and I made it just over 3.5 miles :) (It took me about 45 minutes) Although, my knee did hurt quite a bit after I got home. I'll deal with that another time. But by the time I got off I had blisters on the inside arch of my foot and my toes were hurting and feeling cramped. At which point I realized I forgot to mention to the girl how enormously wide my feet are. So I took them back today and she watched me run some more and exchanged them for new ones. (She also suggested running socks which I, naturally, bought) My new ones are made by Saucony and they look like this:

They're a Progrid Omni 7 Moderate if any of you know what that means. I don't. I'll let you know how they do.

- This one is also about running. So it really could be a sub-bullet point of the last one. But I'm letting it stand on my own. Just a personal decision. I think I'm going to sign up to do the Monument Ave 10K here in Richmond at the end of March. This race is a huge deal around here, and I know lots of people who are doing it. They limit registration to 35,000 so I need to hurry ;) They have a training program through the local Y that I think I'll sign up for. How scary is that? Last year at this time I couldn't even run 6.2 yards, much less 6.2 miles! But I really want to do it. I'll be sure and keep you updated on my training. Quit holding your breath. It's like 2.5 months away and I don't think you can go that long without breathing.

- After I went shoe shopping yesterday, I went costume shopping. Some friends are having a come-dressed-as-a-movie-character birthday party in a few weeks, and I've been thinking about what to wear. So I went into a costume rental store just to try on a few things. It was SO MUCH FUN! It was like grown-up dress up. And, honestly, it was mostly fun because I could fit into the costumes ;) I would NEVER have even dreamed of trying that when I was heavier.

- Despite the fact that I bought some size 14 jeans tonight (a size I haven't seen since like middle school), I am feeling FAT FAT FAT FAT. Part of it is the fact that my stomach is shaped like a muffin top even when I'm not wearing pants, so I always have this nasty stomach roll to contend with. Part of it is some recent pictures. And part of it is just seeing the fat. It used to be that just be "normal sized" would make me happy. Now I think I'm going to need to be actually thin. Maybe this is part of my grumpy mood this week. Maybe I'm PMSing and have hormones flying all around. Maybe this is part of my "good enough is never good enough" mentality/issues. Maybe it's just part of the normal cycle following WLS. Maybe I need to seek therapy. Maybe this whole bullet was TMI for some of you. Sorry!

- On Friday, Abby turns 2!!!! And Brian is being baptized on Sunday. So everyone (and I mean EVERYONE) is going down for the weekend. I'm really excited - it will be fun. I'm also really excited that I'm staying a day longer than everyone else so I'll have some time with my sister. She reminded me that last year on this weekend the two of us went to Patriot's Point. (Since Kay planned so well and had Abby near MLK, Jr. day we fortunately always have a long weekend to go down and celebrate.) It was a good time, as you can see from these pics:



So I'm thinking that we need to make a "sister outing" a tradition for this weekend. I haven't mentioned this to Kay yet, but I'm sure she'll agree. Kay? Whaddayathink?

This is why I should post more often. I get so wordy when I don't....

Here's to lots of sleep and warmth for all of you! And me, too!

A New Year...

Ok, it's that time of year. Let's look back at the past year and forward to the new one. Because I said so, that's why!

This has been an amazing year for me in so many ways - I have a new job that I love at a great school with co-workers who have really made me feel accepted and welcome. I've become involved with a great group at my church and made new friends there as well. And let's not forget that I've lost over 100 pounds (almost at 120 now!), so I look and feel like a new person, and all the myriad of new things that go with that. At this time last year, I had none of that - or even an inkling that any of it would happen!

So why am I still not satisfied? Why do I want more, more, more?? Why do I feel like none of these things are good enough if I can't find a husband, get a house, and have a baby? Because I'm a fallen, sinful, greedy human I suppose. My small group (yet another blessing to come out of this year!) has been studying John Piper's book When I Don't Desire God: How to Fight for Joy. So my goal this year is to do just that: fight for joy. We are commanded by God to fight for joy, which comes only through growing closer to him. Although you would have to do the whole study to really get a lot out of it, here are Piper's 15 strategies to use in the fight for joy:

1. Meditate on the Word of God day and night.
2. When reading, focus on the centrality of God.
3. Do not skip the terrifying parts of the Bible.
4. Learn to preach to yourself.
5. Pray earnestly and continually for everything you need to be happy in God.
6. Fight against every sin in your life.
7. Share your faith.
8. Spend time with God-saturated people.
9. Read biographies of great Christian saints.
10. Read great books about God.
11. Get the rest, exercise, and proper diet that God has ordained you need.
12. Make a proper use of revelation in nature.
13. Do the hard and loving thing for the sake of others.
14. Get a global vision for Christ and pour yourself out to the unreached.
15. Be patient in the night of God's seeming absence.

It's an overwhelming list, so I'm just going to concentrate on making sure I do at least one of them daily.

On a completely different note, I went to the movies this morning. (Marley and Me - cute, made me cry, but not going to make my top 10 list) They must be making those seats bigger. I fit in it with room for my arms as well and room to spare. You can't imagine the horror of going to the movies and being afraid you won't fit into the seat until you've been there....or of having to put your arms on the armrests because there's no room for them in your seat.

Pet Peeves

Here are two pet peeves of mine that were realized today -

1. Why do grocery store baggers think that you don't need your cat food in a bag? I am totally with them on things that have handles - cat litter, milk, soda cans, whatever. But bags of cat food? How exactly am I supposed to carry that with my other bags? I feel this way about toilet paper, too. But the toilet paper is too big to fit in the bag so, while frustrating for me, I can understand. I ALWAYS rip the plastic around my toilet paper trying to get it into the house.
2. This year, I've decided that I'm enjoying classic Christmas hymns. Why do people always feel like they need to "mix it up"? There are some ridiculous versions out there. (Ok, sometimes I like them. But mostly - no.) Today in church, they decided to sing the first verse of "O Come All Ye Faithful" painfully slow and pause between each line. We had no way of knowing about these mysterious pauses, so we kept singing into the silence, which was awkward. People were giggling. Then, all of a sudden, they burst out the second verse into a ho-down! I'm not kidding - fiddles and all. I felt like I should be square dancing. To "O Come All Ye Faithful".

These do not compare to my biggest pet peeve - children calling adults by their title and first name, like "Ms. Sarah" - but bothered me today nonetheless :)

Being Thankful

At church, we have a monthly prayer focus where we join with churches all around the area to pray for a specific area. For December, it's for those who are lonely and without family. I've been feeling really sad lately about being single. (A normal thing, but I definitely go through ups and downs with it. Last week, the leader at Kid's Club made a totally normal innocent comment that "As far as I know, no one in this room has ever been pregnant" and it completely, completely crushed me. Out of the blue and for no reason) But that prayer and lunch today have forced me to think about how blessed I truly am. I have an amazing family that supports me no matter what. I have great friends that I can totally count on. For goodness sake, I have 217 Facebook friends! ;) God knows how incredibly weak I am, so he has given me a great support system.

Although, if you know any single, Christian, 30-something guys feel free to send them my way... ;)

Last thing for today. I promise. My favorite sister and her family made it to Lynchburg today (although I won't get to see them until next weekend :( ) and Brian rolled over! Yay!!! I don't have a picture of it, but I do have a picture of Brian, so here you go:
(I know, look at all that hair! That's what everyone says. At 10 weeks old in this picture, he already needs a haircut. Doesn't it make him look like a little old man? Isn't he just SO SWEET?)


Toodles!

Magic Shoe Update

So it turns out that I didn't switch my black Danskos with my mom. They're not my sister's or my brother's girlfriend's either. I don't know who else I could have switched with. Maybe they are really magic....

Our school Christmas party was tonight and I had so much fun! The staff at Fair Oaks are so fantastic. They have been so welcoming and sweet to me and I feel very much a part of them already. Plus, they're just fun, fun people. I just feel really, really, really blessed to be working there with them. (You may have to remind me of this at some point when I'm frustrated with my job. If only my job could be just hanging out with the staff.... Anyone know of a job like that?)

I don't know if you realize this or not, but I'm typing this at 12:40 am. That's two Fridays in a row I've been up past midnight. Maybe I am turning into a party animal in my old age.... probably not, though ;)

I learned an important lesson tonight - don't hate the player, hate the game. I used to get confused about which one I was supposed to hate. No more, my friends. No more. Thanks, Johnny.

Magic Healing Shoes

(No, this is NOT going to be like that sappy shoe song that gets overplayed at Christmas. I don't do sappy. That song, much like the song "Don't Laugh at Me" and the book The Kissing Hand, makes me want to hurt someone. Namely, the person who is inflicting them on me)

I have three pairs of Dansko clogs (2 pairs were Christmas gifts from a child in Charlottesville - you know I don't pay that much for shoes on my own) - black, brown, and shiny Carolina blue! If you've ever met me or my cats, you know that I have some very destructive pets. One of the things that they have destroyed is the insole of my black Danskos. They have torn them up scratching or biting or whatever it is they do when I'm not here. It doesn't bother me so much - after a minute or so, you can't even feel it so I keep on wearing them anyway.

I realized tonight that the insoles of my black Danskos are in perfect shape. No rips or tears. Nothing. I can't say how long they've been this way - we learned in the last post how unobservant I am. I have three theories:

#1 - My favorite and the one I choose to believe - My shoes are magic and have healed themselves. It is Christmas, after all!

#2 - Some friend or family member noticed their decrepit state, took them out, had them re-soled, and returned them without me noticing.

#3 - I mixed mine up with my mom's black Danskos last time I was home.

Which theory do you choose to believe? I think this issue is going to be sweeping the nation soon!

P.S. - I keep finding new blogs! Check out this post or this one from Bryan Allain and this one from Trey Morgan. You may find you want to stay awhile!

Sleep well my friends!

The Great Cat Search.

Ok, I'm going to go ahead and tell you this upfront. You already know this if you know me well, but - I'm the world's worst pet owner. Seriously. I have two cats and am desperate to give them away to someone who will let them be outdoor cats. If you know someone, let me know.

Today I realized that I hadn't seen my fat girl cat, Christine, for a while. Like a day or two at least. So I looked all over my apartment for her (this took about 3.25 minutes in my giant abode) and she was nowhere to be found. I immediately felt really guilty because she must have run out the door one time when I left and I didn't notice! And it has been REALLY cold - it snowed last night. So, although I wasn't sad in a "I'll-miss-this-cat" kind of way, I was really upset in a "I'm-an-awful-person-she's-freezing-or-dead-and-I-didn't-even-notice" kind of way. Keep in mind here, I have two cats so one of them is always pestering me. I just don't always pay attention to which one it is. Cats are independent. They like to be left alone. I'm trying to help them out.

So I decided, without much optimism, that I had to go at least try and look for her. Did I mention that it's COLD here?!?! So I found her after 10-15 minutes, chillin' on the railing of the apartment building next door. (Yes, it took me 15 minutes to get next door. I went the other way first) She was in front of an apartment - I don't know if they had fed her or petted her, or if she just picked that spot. Anyway, I went and got her. She did try to get away from me a little bit, which I did not think was an appropriate way to treat the woman who has taken care of her for 3 years and has now rescued her from the cold, but I brought her home. Now we get to the other bad part...

I'm not totally sure I got the right cat. I mean, it looks just like my cat - dark gray tiger stripes, fat, no collar. What are the chances that a cat that looks EXACTLY like mine would be chillin' at the building next to mine when Christine was lost? Very slim, I'm sure. She does seem fatter than before, but I don't really know about that. (Although it could be that she's been gone longer than I realized and I've just gotten used to looking at the skinnier one) But Raoul (my other cat) is hissing at her and stuff. Usually they are total BFF. They came from the same litter - they've been together all their lives! And she was sniffing the ground. That seems like something a cat who had never been here before would do, but then again - it could be something she does regularly. As I've said, I'm not exactly the most attentive cat parent. AND she sat on the ground in front her favorite chair instead of jumping up in it.

Am I overreacting here? Tell me I'm overreacting. This is my cat, right? Here. I'll post an old picture of Christine and one that I took just now and you can let me know.

Christine a month or two ago

Christine today

Ok, this was good. I compared the markings in the two pictures so now I'm sure it's the same cat. Although she does look thinner in the now picture. I guess I just didn't pay attention to how fat she was getting. Maybe that's how I got so fat, too... I wonder why Raoul is hissing at her? (Yes, my cats are named after characters in The Phantom of the Opera. That's because I'm cool like that.)

It's a good thing Christine got in the way when I tried to take that picture of all my too-big clothes a while back. If Raoul got out, I don't think I'd have any pictures to compare to.

Know anyone who wants some cats?

Just so you know -

It is now 1:15 AM and I am awake. See? I am a party animal!!

I had a great time at the Park Ave. party tonight. We will not discuss the two hours it took me to get there driving all over creation and back. No, no. That only makes me feel idiotic and dumb. We will only discuss how it was after midnight when I left. That, my friend, is because I am young and cool and can do these sorts of things. A couple of times a year.

I wouldn't count on me making it to 1:30, though....

The obligatory Thanksgiving post

As a blogger, I think there is a law somewhere that says I have to post a list of things I am thankful for at Thanksgiving. If I don't, I get thrown in blogger jail where baby rats nibble at my fingers and toes all day long. Since right now I am very thankful to be holding the cutest, sweetest, happiest 10 week old in history (who is fascinated by the words appearing on the screen), it seems a good time. So, here we are in no particular order except the order that I think of them:

Things Sarah Is Thankful For:

1. Abby and Brian (come on, you knew that one was coming)
2. The rest of my family :)
3. My friends
4. Ramses, my awesome Ford Escape
5. Flat Cherry Coke Zero
6. My WLS
7. Jeans
8. Naps
9. My job - sometimes
10. This sweet baby in my lap (I know I already mentioned him - it's Brian - but he's really really sweet.)
11. Digital cameras
12. Facebook for stalking people
13. The internet in general for being a terrific time waster
14. La'Nasia for saying something that makes me laugh every day
15. UNC basketball
16. USA network for making awesome shows like Monk, Psych, and Burn Notice
17. Game Club
18. My church, West End Pres, and the Young Adults group there
19. Dishwashers and washing machines
20. Abby (because it's not fair for Brian to get two mentions and her to only get one)
21. Treadmills with individual TVs at the gym
22. Power windows
23. Having 4 distinct seasons
24. Starter logs for my fireplace
25. Christ

Ok, people. That's as sappy as I get. I've had a crazy week but luckily it was a short holiday week! I'm spending Thanksgiving in Lynchburg with all of my crazy family. Have a great time so far :)

I think I hear Abby waking up. Better go get her!

Warm fuzzies

Sometimes being a teacher leads to great moments. (And often it leads to very stressful moments, but this is not about those) Last week, my 3rd graders were using a basic template to write a poem about something they like. Here's sweet Daija's poem:

Ms. Nash

I like Ms. Nash
Ask me why
Because she is beautful
Because she is funny
Because she bring books to me
Because she is nice
Because she help me on my test
Because she have nice hair
Because she have nice jewelry
Because
Because
Because
I like Ms. Nash

Not to be outdone, Tre'Shanna threw away the template and produced this one:

I like Ms. Nash

She is nice to me
and she help me on
everthing and she
help me on the test
and she her hiar is long
and her shirt is my
fivorte coler love
Tre'Shanna

We may have some work on spelling and grammer to do still :), but I may frame them anyway. I just love these kids! Last week's dance party was another example of how awesome they are :)

Today I went to Charlottesville to shop with my cool friends Sarah and Meg who used to teach with me. We went to the Barracks Road shopping center and David Baldacci was there speaking and signing books at the Barnes and Noble! I love his books and was so excited. Sarah and Meg patiently waited over an hour while I listened to him talk and waited in line to get him to sign a book to my grandmother (I was #65 in line!)

I have decided that in order to solidify my status as a young adult woman, I need to join a book club. Because that's what we do. So I am now officially looking for a book club to join. I don't know how to begin. Any ideas?

Surviving :)

God was so good to me yesterday.

Someone must have been praying for me, because I admit- I didn't take the time to do it for myself. It was a long day at school - we had a parent workshop last evening and I'm on the committee in charge of it. But Title 1 pays for a lot of the stuff, and I had some Title 1 requirements to meet as well, so I had a big part in pulling it off. I was at school for 12 1/2 hours yesterday which were completely and totally filled with business. I didn't stop to rest at all. (Well, I did get to sit down and eat my lunch. That was nice.) I had a to-do list that blew my mind. The workshop was taking place in 6 different classrooms so I had to be sure we had everything and distribute it between the classrooms. Usually having this much on my plate causes me to hyperventilate and cry ;)

Yesterday it didn't.

I calmly went from one task to the next, checking them off and moving to the next. I (amazingly) didn't get tired or run down. It just got done and the whole thing got pulled off. I won't say without a hitch b/c there were hitches - but everything worked out. The evening was well attended and, even better, it's over!

Today is Friday, the last day of this crazy week. I have a Title 1 meeting all day today. While this may sound like a relief, these meetings inevitably stress me out more than I was before because of all the paperwork and procedures. Plus, Fridays I don't teach as many groups at school so I can get caught up on my paperwork - which I have a lot of at the moment. So this meeting is really the last thing I want to be doing. But I have learned that, as someone says, "If God brings you to it, he will get you through it." Now I know that saying should be applied in more dire situations than mine, but I'm using it anyway.

And tonight - I get to hang out with some good friends! And tomorrow - possibly more good friends! And that will just make it all better. Then next week - Thanksgiving!!!!!

So, thank you for your kind words and supports. And especially your prayers, you mystery prayers out there!