Sunday, June 29, 2008

More thoughts on servanthood and disappointment

Yesterday as I drove up to the BBQ, I was thinking about what I had written about using a life that doesn't meet up to my expectations to serve God. And I realized that I could quickly encounter another problem - pride. I believe that attitude matters to God. If I'm helping someone who is "overlooked", or doing something like picking up trash that no one will see but am thinking to myself "Wow. Look at me. Isn't it nice of me to do this even though I don't want to? Yep. I'm being Christ-like now. God's going to love me more than these other people because I'm better and I try harder", is that truly being a servant? Now, admit it. While those exact words probably don't occur to you, haven't we all felt that way? Proud and puffed-up because we're doing something for others?

It's a thin line to walk - for me, at least - between self-pity and pride. I find that most days I fall on one side or the other. My goal is for an attitude of genuine humility, with eyes clearly on Christ and not myself.

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